This week, everyone is talking about young women’s sex lives. Sure, that’s pretty much always the case — but this week saw the birth of an interesting debate about whether young sex-positive women are shunning the drunken one-night stands of yesteryear and reconsidering (whispers) abstinence.
via Everyone’s an expert on girls’ sex lives – Sex News, Sex Talk – Salon.com.
Anyhow, today’s post is going to be one of those conversations is what I’m saying. It all started when a reader asked me in the comments of one of my Bodily Functions & Fitness 101 posts how exercise affects your sex life. She then added helpfully that her sex drive went through the floor when she was working out a lot. You know I love a good over-share!
Without asking too many personal questions, let’s take a look at the research (because you know somebody somewhere got grant money to study this!):
via Charlotte Hilton Andersen: Does Fitness Improve Your Sex Life?.
OK, it’s truth time: Are you an always, sometimes or never kind of girl? The women on these pages share exactly where they stand on the orgasm meter and what it took to make theirs better, much better. Listen and learn.
This is how the orgasm fairy tale goes: You meet Prince Charming, and from the very first time, he knows exactly how your body works. There’s some kissing, some foreplay, some moaning and, after maybe 10 minutes of intercourse, bam—a shattering climax for two. Angels may even sing. If your sex life fits this description, kudos. If not, this story is for you.
In reality, women are all over the orgasm map, and in an effort to improve your sex life, we asked dozens of them to reveal what they’ve learned, what they do—and what they’re not afraid to ask for. After reading some of their stories, you’ll abandon your assumptions about the way orgasms are “supposed” to happen. And you’ll stop waiting, like some damsel in distress, for a guy to magically unchain your pleasure. Turns out, of course, that you are your very own knight in shining armor, and this is your road map to a happy ending.
via Real Women Tell Their Orgasm Secrets: Sex, Love & Life: glamour.com.
Ex-wife accused actor of “potentially deadly” acts in court filing
JUNE 5–As investigators try to determine how actor David Carradine wound up hanging naked and dead in a Bangkok hotel closet with a rope tied around his genitals, a review of divorce court filings shows that his most recent ex-wife once accused the actor of “deviant sexual behavior which was potentially deadly.” Additionally, Marina Anderson alleged in a sworn declaration that Carradine engaged in an “incestuous relationship with a very close family member.” Anderson’s declaration, an excerpt of which you’ll find below, was filed in mid-2003 in Los Angeles Superior Court (the document was supposed to be filed under seal but was mistakenly placed in the public court file, where TSG found it). The declaration does not detail Carradine’s alleged “deviant sexual behavior.” As for the incest charge, Anderson reported that Carradine and the unnamed relative admitted the taboo relationship, but that her “pleas for him to get counseling in regards to this matter were ignored and he wanted no part in the healing process the other person needed in order to get closure.” In a phone interview today, Anderson, who was married to Carradine for four years, said she stands by the allegations in her court filing, but declined to further discuss her charges. A Bangkok police official told reporters that investigators were examining whether Carradine accidentally suffocated while engaging in an autoerotic sex act. (4 pages)
via Carradine s “Deviant Sexual Behavior” – June 5 2009.
This week’s segment of CBS Doc Dot Com sexual addiction, a subject about which I learned absolutely nothing in medical school and have not learned much more since. In researching the topic over the past week, I began to understand that it is extremely controversial, with experts not even agreeing about whether sexual addiction is a true addiction.
When most people hear the term, they usually think they know what’s meant by sexual addiction. They may think of someone (usually a man) who has an incessant need to make sexual conquests, sometimes despite his own best intentions. But even back in the days when Sam Malone got this diagnosis on the old TV show “Cheers,” it was clear that a real definition was lacking. In 1998, two researchers published an article entitled “Sexual addiction: many conceptions, minimal data.” As Erick Janssen, Ph.D., Director of Education & Research Training at The Kinsey Institute, explained to me in an email: “We do not have a generally accepted definition of ‘sex addiction.’ It was originally approached as involving some kind of ‘inability to adequately control sexual behavior,’ but this is, as you can tell, not a very objective definition. According to some, sexual addiction seems in the eye of the beholder, or in the eyes of his or her therapist.”
For one side of the definitional argument, I spoke to addictions treatment specialist Mavis Humes Baird, who is convinced that sexual addiction is a true disorder because people are in the throws of an impulse they can’t control, that there are underlying changes in the brain that cannot be addressed by psychotherapy alone. She told me, “for example, if one of the partners in a couple is having affairs and they’re not a sex addict, marriage counseling or family therapy is very effective. But if they’re a sex addict, all the therapy in the world getting at problems in the relationship won’t touch the addiction. One of the primary referral sources for sex addiction is couples counselors who have been doing attachment work with couples for years with the addiction going on unaffected and sometimes kept secret for all those years. You can’t treat the sex problems between the partners until the addiction is treated. And that’s done by a combination of specific treatment protocols, and 12-step program involvement, and sometimes medication.”
via Dr. Jon LaPook: Sex Addiction: Is It Really an Addiction?.
Your sex life used to sizzle, but lately the heat between the sheets has turned icy. The two of you may be suffering from a case of lopsided libidos. Find out how to get back in sync sexually. Plus, rate your sex drive with our quiz…
Douglas, a 30-something physician in central Florida, remembers a time in the not-so-distant past when he had rock ‘n’ roll sex with his wife. Before they married and before their daughter was born, sex was not only frequent but inventive.
But about three years into their relationship, he noticed a marked change. Things his wife once enjoyed started dwindling and eventually were off the menu completely.
via 5 Solutions for a Lopsided Libido | Lifescript.com.
Teens in Documentary Say Oral Sex ‘Not That Big of a Deal’ and Get Paid for Sexual Favors
By CLAIRE SHIPMAN and COLE KAZDIN
May 28, 2009
They don’t give their names, but viewers can see their faces plainly and what these teens are saying is shocking parents.
“I ended up having sex with more than one person that night and then in the morning I was trying to get morning-after pills,” one of the girls said. “I was, like, 14 at the time.”
It’s just one of dozens of stories from teenage girls in a new documentary by Canadian filmmaker Sharlene Azam that aims to shed light on the secret, extremely sexual lives of today’s teens.
via Teens: Oral Sex and Casual Prostitution No Biggie – ABC News.
BEIJING (AFP) – A sex theme park in southwest China that exhibits naked human sculptures, giant genitals and boasts a sex technique workshop is stirring up howls of protest, according to state press.
“Love Land“, billed as China‘s first-ever sex theme park, is slated to open in Chongqing municipality in October, but detractors hope the project will never see the light of day, the China Daily reported.
“We are building the park for the good of the public… to help adults enjoy a harmonious sex life,” the paper quoted park manager Lu Xiaoqing as saying.
via China sex theme park causing controversy: media.
CHICAGO — Illinois Attorney General Lisa Madigan says that Craigslist is getting rid of its “erotic services” ads and will create a new adult category that Web site employees will review.
Madigan’s office said Wednesday that such existing ads on Craigslist will expire in seven days.
Madigan and the attorneys general for Connecticut and Missouri met with Craigslist officials last week seeking an end to ads they contend are advertisements for illegal sexual activities.
via Craigslist Erotic Services Ads To Be Removed From Site.
Is your sex life in a rut? Do you want to try out something new, but are unsure of how to go about doing so? Author Tracey Cox explains everything you need to know in her book, Secrets of A Supersexpert, from sex tips, miscellaneous trivia, and the psychology of falling in love.Forum: Sex Tips that work
For instance, two in every thousand men can perform oral sex on themselves, women have the highest libido during days 12-16 of their cycle, and having more sex pretty much guarantees less erection problems. Just a few things to bring up at your next office function…
Tracey also points out, that while being in a long-term relationship can lead to love, often times lust and attraction can fade over time. Which does not always fare well for your sex life.
Here are some ideas to help spice things up, direct from Ms. Cox:
via Stale Sex? 6 Secrets From A Supersexpert – YourTango.
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